Thought adulthood was a myth, arrested me for trespassing
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Mar 02, 2026
His mouth looks like a group chat that never replies
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Acting like life’s together, but chaos is my roommate
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Flexing that crown but still can’t handle a group project.
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Professor locks syllabus like a SEC-10 filing.
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Brainy friend in the group tries fixing socials but fails hard.
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Walking JSON schema validation error, charging emotional labor.
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Bro, your laugh sounds like a dying seal.
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Bro’s smirk screams ‘I got rizz,’ but that shirt’s chopped cheese.
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just practiced that look in the mirror and got no rizz at all
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That look when your masterpiece is a mood and the audience is a bubble.
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Homer’s hips don’t lie, but my Tinder matches do.
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